“But if I live in the flesh, this the is the fruit of my labour: yet what I shall choose I wot not.” (KJV) Philippians 1:22
Okay, I’ll admit it to you…
I’ve been thinking about giving up the blog. I slowly have become so involved in other things and I…just have been distracted. The fervor of my convictions is still there, I just don’t know if the blog is read. Sometimes I think it’s just for me and my studying and my walk with God. If so, why go through all that effort then? I could study without all the formatting and grammar.
I know how to get more views. It’s easy. All I have to do is talk about sex, relationships and do reviews for popular books on the best seller list. Then I’d get way more views. It would change the foundation of this blog though. Then I look at the name, Supporting Godly Women, and I think, this isn’t a blog focused on female issues like PMS, husbands, child rearing or childcare. I have never shared a recipe, a coupon or a day planner to show you how to organize your home. I MUST need to change the name. I’m hopelessly stuck on one subject! Sheesh. Well then I think, I should loosen up, change the name, and simmer in the same pot with everyone else out there. Then I’ll get more views. Or I should just give up. There are about sixty of you out there reading this blog. What do you think?
Do you like the drama of the mainstream media? Do you think I should take part?
Everyday when I come to this chair and keyboard I ask, what is this verse about God? What are you trying to point out? I pull out all my reference books, concordance, books on studying the Bible, my literal interpretations, my King James version with all my notes in it, my Companion Bible, Enjoying the Bible by EW Bullinger and then I search. It sometimes takes me three hours to produce one post. I try like crazy to keep it under a thousand words because I know how busy you are. And sheesh, I’m busy! Is all of this worth it? Can I keep it up at this pace of five posts a week? It’s been slipping to 4 and 3 lately. Then I read a verse like today’s verse.
“Yet if I continue to live physically, this (advancement of the gospel) is the fruit of MY labor (for which I am rewarded). I do not make known my personal preference.”
Hmm…gives a girl something to think about. Here Paul was choosing between living and dying… and I’M conflicted about a post before my coffee brews. God, please forgive me for being a spoil brat. Ha! Look at the pile of effort in just my reference books alone! This blog fills me with joy because I want to have Paul’s kind of commitment. There are other things too. There are people walking about their daily lives blindly bumping into catastrophe. They would’ve avoided that had they read my blog. Oh sorry… now I’m getting preachy, just keep in mind that I’m typing here in my little office and thinking of all the crap I did as I have grown in the Word. I was gossipy, selfish, pretentious, critical, prideful and arrogant all before my feet hit the floor in the morning. I don’t know how God put up with me! Okay, that was yesterday…
What I’m saying is…we all feel like giving up sometimes. Even Paul. But I love that last statement. “I do not my known my personal preference.” Why? Because he didn’t want to discourage the Philippians or anyone else. Feeding on negative only produces more negative. We may feel like giving up, but if we keep talking fear and defeat, we feed it. I assume that what YOU want in a blog post isn’t anything near mainstream. Otherwise, why would you be here? I stick out like a healed thumb, just like you. We’re positive, resourceful, do-it-yourselfers who have an inner drive to learn what God really wants for our lives. If I changed this blog, I’d lose you. I’d no longer be the refreshing, positive voice you look for in the morning. I know you feel that way because many of you have told me that. You, all six or sixty of you, are my precious like-minded sisters and brothers in Christ. You may have just found this quirky lady’s blog but you’re here and God will bless you just like He has the rest of us.
We learn together. We grow together. I still have a long way to go. Heck, I do this FOR my busy life, my busy kid and husband. I do this because I’ve fallen in love with Love. I want to hear more from you but, just like me, I know you’re a busy person. You’re out there trying out God’s Word in your busy life. One day, probably the first day of heaven, I’ll search you out and we’ll sit for a spell. It’s gonna be a nice long chat because then, we’ll have lots of time. :)
Till then…keep on reading here at Supporting Godly Women and know that I love you and I’m not going anywhere.
God bless you today!